Teaching Kids About Money When You're Still Learning

"Can we buy this?" my eight-year-old asked, holding up a $30 toy at Target. I realized I had no idea how to answer this question in a way that taught her about money, value, and decision-making. My own financial education had been non-existent, leaving me with anxiety around money that I desperately didn't want to pass down. How do you teach what you're still learning yourself?

The Money Messages We Inherited

Many of us received confusing or harmful messages about money growing up: "Money doesn't grow on trees," "We can't afford that," or the opposite extreme of never discussing money at all. These experiences left us unprepared to have healthy, educational conversations about money with our own children, perpetuating cycles of financial anxiety or ignorance.

Learning Together Instead of Pretending to Know

I started being honest about my own learning journey: "I'm still figuring out how to make good money decisions too. Let's learn together." We began talking about money in age-appropriate ways—how we earn it, how we decide what's worth spending on, and how saving works. I shared my thought process when making financial decisions, making the invisible visible.

Practical Money Lessons for Daily Life

We started with simple concepts: comparing prices at the store, talking about needs vs. wants, and giving them small amounts of money to manage themselves. When they wanted something expensive, we'd discuss saving plans and opportunity costs. "If you buy this toy, you won't have money for the book fair next week. What matters more to you?"

Modeling Healthy Money Relationships

The most important thing I could teach wasn't specific financial skills but a healthy relationship with money. I showed them that money is a tool, not a source of worth or security. I demonstrated thoughtful decision-making, contentment with what we have, and generosity when possible. I also modeled that financial mistakes are learning opportunities, not moral failings.

Teaching children about money while learning yourself creates an opportunity for growth that benefits the whole family. Your honesty about not having all the answers teaches them that financial literacy is a lifelong journey, not a destination. Together, you can build healthier money relationships than either of you inherited.

Find more guidance on teaching life skills in "Unexpected Gifts of Parenting"—where learning together strengthens family bonds.